Phipps Dead

Phipps Found Dead

Violet Phipps in Big Bad Dave with that look

Superstar actress, Violet Phipps (32), has been found dead in her suite of rooms at the Royal Court Hotel.
Angela Spenser, a chambermaid at the Royal Court, found the body of Miss Phipps on Wednesday morning when cleaning the suite. Miss Phipps had been in Panchestor performing in the smash hit show Get Up Them Stairs.

Officer Jennifer Ashton was first on the scene, soon followed by Sergeant Duckery and Detective Inspector Dirk Sunburn. Doctor Derek Swann was called to the Royal Court and at 12:21pm pronounced Miss Phipps dead. DI Sunburn said the police are treating the death as suspicious.

Angela Spenser said, “I first suspected something was not quite right when I went to clean Miss Phipps' rooms. I found her door open. I wondered if Miss Phipps had just forgotten to close the door so I called through, but received no reply. I entered the suite and called again. The place was like a bomb site – all the cupboards and drawers were open and Miss Phipps' possessions were everywhere.

Violet Phipps in Very Little

“I walked through the suite to the master bedroom. I can tell you, I was terrified. I went into the bedroom. I did not see her at first. Her body was on the bed beneath a sheet. I called her name, but she did not response. I shock her shoulder and the sheet fell away from her face – it was then I knew she was dead. I have never seen an expression like it. For such a beautiful face to be twisted, distorted in such terror – such agony. I will never forget that face”.

Miss Spenser was later struck down with nervous shock and is staying with her brother Reverend Spenser, and his wife, Hilda Spenser, at Hornstown rectory.

In a police statement DI Sunburn said, “We can confirm that the body of Violet Phipps was found in her suite of rooms at the Royal Court Hotel, Panchestor. The door to her rooms had been forced open. There is evidence that the rooms were searched by a person or persons unknown.

Royal Court Hotel
Panchestor

“There is little more I can add until the completion of the autopsy and crime scene analysis, but we are definitely treating this death as suspicious – we suspect foul play.

“As you may know Miss Phipps was an orphan, but we are trying to contact her friends, and our thoughts are with the people who were close to her”.

Panchestor council have set up a help line for people distressed by the death of Miss Phipps. If you need to talk you can call: Panchestor – 4453.

Bicycle Thief

Police were called to the home of Belinda Tongue, (36), of Hanging Green Lane, Hornstown on Sunday. Mrs. Tongue reported a child's pink Bicycle stolen.

Raleigh rsw 16

In an exclusive interview Mrs. Tongue told the Herald “I heard a noise out the back on Saturday night, but thought nothing of it. On Sunday morning my husband, Jonathan, happened to go into the back garden and found that the shed door had been forced and Roberta's Bike was missing.
"She had only got it last week for her birthday. It was a pink Raleigh RSW 16 with a white carry case on the back. We had paid for it on lay-away at the Hornstown cooperative for the last 6 months. What kind of monster would do such a thing”.

Constable Jennifer Ashton said, “This is the first bicycle thief in Hornstown this year. We are treating this case very seriously. It could be the thin end of a formidable wedge”.

Simon Sharp and his predictive poop

Today I had a loose, speedy and rather unsatisfying motion. Upon examining the results of the third wipe there was a clear mark in the shape of a tea clipper in full sail.

[Disclaimer – This prediction is solely the view of Simon Sharp. The Hornstown Herald accepts no liability whatsoever for any losses incurred by following this prediction. We do not condone gambling.]

Horse Fair Opens

Lady Petra Nettlewich enjoys a ride

Saturday saw the grand opening of the Annual Horse Fair at Pastor's Field. The Duke opened the fair, and he and his family tried some of the rides.

The Duchess of
Panchestor

It was a somber occasion for the Duke as this weekend is the tenth anniversary of the death of the Duchess. Duchess Hilda Nettlewich died in a freak carriage accident on Pleasant road when her horses bolted after being frightened by the lights of the big wheel.

Earlier in the day Pleasant Lane was closed so the Duke and his family could pay their respects at the statue erected in remembrance of the Duchess.

Silver Mine Is a Gold Mine

The John Horn silver mine has reported record profits.

John Horn Silver Mine

John Horn created the mining company after stumbling on Green Hills County in 1862. The mining operation continues to be the largest employer in the Green Hills.

Clark Cloud, the mine's manager said, “It is a pleasing state of affairs given the financial circumstances around the world. Even though this is a positive report we can not relax. We must continue to endeavour to be the most efficient mining company n the world”.

Union leader, Jeff Fox Said “Bugger efficiency and endeavour. It's time those buggers at the top started talking about reward. Reward for the efforts and sacrifices of the workers. It is us that risk our lives, it is us that breaks sweat and get our bodies torn by the unforgiving rocks. It is us, the workers, should get the benefits”.

Animal Crackers

Mrs. Veronica Quillet,
the zoo manager

The autopsy of the dead animals from the Green Hills Zoo is complete. The results suggest that the animals at the zoo were killed with a variety of different poisons. The killer or killers injected the poisons into the backs of the necks of the animals.

Dr. Derek Swann said, “There were several different poisons used, including cyanide, hemlock, ricin, strychnine and Potassium chloride. Another interesting point is that the volume of poison was different with each animal, but the amounts did not seem random”.

Mrs. Veronica Quillet, the zoo manager, to shocked to comment.

Matthew, one year on

Some say your bark was worse than your bite

But even Mr. Meadows, the postman, knows that's not quite right -

And Mr. Merry and Mr. Hartfield,
And Mrs. Quillet and Herbert Westby

And Mr. Baker and Nurse Harting,
And Roberta Tongue and Officer Duckery.

We cried when we received the order to destroy

They didn't understand, you were really a good boy.

Jenny and Philip Capp

Twelve today.

Happy Birthday Lucian Spenser.

Collective noun of the week

A crash of rhinoceroses

Editorial

Death now stalks the streets and lanes of Green Hills County. I refer not only to the tragic death of Violet Phipps, but all the zoo animals that, it turns out, were poisoned.

First to Miss Phipps. It is always sad when a young life is lost and to lose one so talented and so loved compounds the emptiness felt by all in Green Hills. The circumstances surrounding the death of Miss Phipps are alarming. It appears that her rooms were broken into and she was robbed and killed. Are the people of Panchestor safe in their houses?

As for the zoo poisonings, it appears that someone has been carrying out a macabre series of experiments, but to what purpose? Why use so many different kinds of poisons? And the different volumes of poison, why? It seems to me that this is the beginning of something, not the end.

There are already whispers on the streets relating these killings to the fairground workers, but we must not jump to conclusions and make unsubstantiated accusations. We must wait for the police, we must wait for the facts and we must wait for the process of law to do it's job.

Herbert Westby, my contact in Magna City and online technician has done a fabulous job. The comments section of the Hornstown Herald blog are up and running so I look forward to hearing from you, the readers.

Next week: The Hornstown herald word competition is launched.